Well I've had quite a busy couple of months and not really had a lot of time to post. Straight after my adventure abroad in the Pro race Omloop Van Borsele, I was back home dealing with exam stress, training, looking after things at home while my family were abroad and trying to keep on top of growing pressure to sort out future plans. But I soon settled again and raced the Forres wkd TT's the week after. Coming first lady in all 3 events and getting a PB for a hilly TT even on tired legs, which I was delighted with! Then the week after I had a rather exciting day rushing between events. Early in the morning on Sunday I raced the Scottish National TT Champs where I got a pb of 24 minutes and 53 seconds which I was chuffed to bits with to finally get under the 25 minute mark which I had been pushing for since the start of the year. This was a good enough ride to get me 2nd junior female, again losing the gold by the same margin of 38 seconds, the same as last year but by a different rider. Then a quick dash across country to Falkirk in time for a rather tough 6 mile TT prologue ahead of the Sharon Argue 30 mile RR in the afternoon. My TT was pretty slow after having done the 10 in the morning my legs thought they had done all there work for the day and had gone to sleep. But the TT soon woke them up and they were going strongly in the RR. I was 7th junior but more importantly I had lasted in the bunch for more than half the race, and even when I slid back from the group I was able to finish strongly bridging across the gap to 5 other riders and almost making it to the finish with them! I was finally feeling hopeful that I was back on track. I was progressively getting quicker in the 10's and handling short road races, yes, SHORT road races.
The Miltonduff road race on Saturday was my next event, just over 55miles on a short fast circuit just down the road from my house. Great start. On the front of the bunch round the first bend and tucking in neatly behind 5 or 6 of the strong men at the front. Perfect position. However we averaged 25 mph the entire race and I was starting to slip back in the bunch only making it back to the front when the race was splitting up. I grew tired quickly sprinting after the men every corner and I soon faded and dropped behind.... but I was still the leading female.. I was time trialling my way to the finish, with just over 8 miles to go when I could feel the bunch coming up close behind I desperately fought hard to keep ahead but i was tiring all the time. The bunch came past and I jumped on the back, but sure enough the other two ladies had done the same thing when they were caught earlier, we were now all back together and I had wasted so much energy trying to keep ahead. I tried to mark them in the bunch, watching there every move, but we were all on our last legs. Karolyn and I dropped with a lap to go but Emily managed to keep with them a bit longer. Leaving Karolyn and I to fight out 2nd and 3rd in a sprint. My head was racing and I felt like I was going to collapse, somehow I managed to convince my legs to go through one last burst of pain. I waited for Karolyn to launch the sprint then manouvered from her wheel and I just threw myself at the line, inching ahead of her to take second. I was quite happy about my ride considering i lasted longest in the bunch but then who am I to know what's a good performance. I was obviously wrong. Strong enough to stay with the men for so long shows I am fit enough to be in there. But why couldn't I sustain it? I was not able to keep my position on the road because I grew tired quickly, I didn't ride smartly enough in the bunch and I couldn't keep the power on for that length of time.
The day after was worse. I was meant to be racing a 25 mile TT but it was my worst time in two years. I was devastated. I knew something wasn't right, of course I was fatigued but there had to be something else wrong. This year has certainly started on a roller coaster again. I've hit several bumps in the road, first with my wrist break, then my back issues and now i'm really struggling to get through my races simply through lack of training while I battled through these injuries. I've been beating myself up a lot about it. Why can't I get it right. There is always something holding me back. I'll just keep fighting no matter what, and hopefully I will eventually get my bit of luck!
